Rescan Update

Well after having a great birthday this past Monday we faced the rescan on Tuesday.  Once again we were told that there was no change and the tumors did not grow nor shrink.  I asked if I am going to have cancer the rest of my life and the answer was yes.  Not the way I planned on starting 28 out.  How do I even prepare for that answer?  How do I even digest it?  Will the tumors ever let up enough to free my nerves so I can walk, bike, live my old life?  I will not be receiving anymore treatments right now, they want to wait until Oct 28 and rescan me...again... and see if there is any changes.

To be honest, I try and stay strong for my family and I keep reminding myself that there are so many people that have it worse than me.  I still take one day at a time and put a smile on my face.  PT is now my main focus.  I set a goal to walk down the aisle at my best friends wedding in October.  I know I may need some help, but if I can make it with a cane that will be a big accomplishment for me.  I feel I am the only thing standing in my way!

I know I have been in so many of your thoughts and prayers, Jon and I are forever grateful for that.  Thank you.

People cry, not because they're weak.  It's because they've been strong for too long.  

Johnny Depp

Fun in the Sun

Well we just returned from OC MD yesterday and had a great vacation.  Saturday morning rained but we were still able to go to the beach in the afternoon.  The waves were crazy this year, I guess from the hurricane that went out to shore instead of inland, produced big waves and riptides.  Finally on Friday I was able to go in the water.  I just floated on a boogie board...better then nothing!  I always hate leaving the beach, its such a sinking feeling in your stomach, but coming home to Remi always makes it disappear.

So tomorrow is supposedly my LAST Avastin treatment.  I won't know anything until the rescan on 8/26.  Health wise I have been feeling okay.  I think I am still tired from the travels yesterday.

Thank you all for you love, support & prayers.  I still get get well cards and I got one 2 weeks ago that I love:

Life is hard sometimes-

crazy, mixed-up, messed up.

And there you are,

in the middle of it,

just doing your thing...

being strong and brave and beautiful 

like it's no big deal.

But let me tell you girl,

it is.

Not everyone can do what you can do.

Not everyone can handle things

the way you can.

While you wonder sometimes

if you are doing okay...

the rest of us are just watching in wonder.